bed time, little things, feelings

Alright. This is  about to get deep. Warning you.

Little things always get over looked.. Small things that you do before going to bed, What you do when you are getting ready for the day, trying something new for the very first  time... Least of all Feelings.

I always overlook the little things, at least I think I do; maybe I don't otherwise I wouldn't be typing this right now.
I forgot what it was like to wash my face, brush my teeth, and wash my toes in the tub before I went to bed. I forgot because I would go to my room and lay on my bed, check instagram, facebook, text, and go back to insta. Later, I would find myself falling asleep in my leggings and t-shirt with the light on and just laying on my bed; eventually I would wander into the bathroom and brush my teeth and mybe my face if I felt up to it.  Ugh. No wonder I didnt feel like I was getting a good nights sleep.
Im making it a goal that no Facebook, and insta after I'm in my bed. I want that to be the place I go to relax and dewindle.
 Ever think of the first time you  did someting? Ever think its the last first time you get to experiance it? I don't realize it until after. My first kiss? Elementry, 6th grade, under a big tree on the play ground. First time I got my stupid period? I wont go there. First time my brother suprised us from the military. BEST suprise ever. The first time I was loved and loved in return. That one is hard to put a time on because do I count the time I loved, or when we said I love you...or our fights and I just waited for your next text. Idk how to calculate that because I didnt choose to love, it grew slowly then all at once. It is amazing. Something I am so glad I got to experience. Love. ok. Time for me to get my head out of the clouds. Back to buisness. Serious buisness. First time I gave a facial, it was AMAZING. I knew that is where I belonged.  I have many firsts of which I remember but to many to list. You know the best thing though? Is that I have MANY more firsts to come and I am SOOO excited.
I am greatful I have the ability to experience feelings; happiness, sadness, excitment,greed,disapointment, love,hope. everything. Without one you do not have the other. I read somewhere " Ther is no such thing as darkness; Just the lack of light." I am a strong believer that you need a bottom to have a top. Do you know how boring it would be to just go through the motions of living?  Just to Exsist?  It would be devistating. however;you wouldnt feel devistated, just there.

this is what I think about.
xo mellisa